My past–my Dream

Sawadee Khrap

Last night before sleeping,  I remembered  a time I spent in jail for drunk driving.  I was in a cell with a guy who had alcoholic hallucinations or the DT’s (delirium tremens).  He saw snakes and bugs everywhere, he would uncoil the snakes from the bars of his cell and pick the  bugs from his food.  He would tell me which one were the good ones and which ones to stay away from – they were evil.  What he saw was very real TO HIM.  It was his life, world, reality, truth , dream, ILLUSION.  Needless to say, His world was very different from mine.  Which one was actually REAL?     Are we both hallucinating?

In Genesis 1 God created the world and humans.  Prefect like God, in His Mind and Image,  they also Create.  God is Life and in Gods MIND everything LIVES AS ONE. 

However, if one did not think with God then it would be a dream, hallucination, illusion, and not Real.    It would not be creating, but MAKING:  like produces like. Dreams produce Dreams – illusions, Illusions.  For instance, if a Child of God (Soul) thought about “What would it be like without God, to be special or separate  ?”

Then he would have to become a character of the dream – himself – encased in a body placing  limitations on the spirit.   Thus,  proving that the impossible occurred, MAKING separation his reality.   A world opposite of what God Created – a dream of  death and illusions.  A world without Love  – just fear,attack, defense, sacrifice and suffering.  The GENESIS 2 story !!!.   The origination of Sin. 

Just like I saw that guy in my cell, Jesus is outside of my dream.  I can look to him for guidance for the path out of this madness – his words now make perfect sense.

It will be a HAPPY NEW YEAR, filled with blessings, if I let it.

God Bless   Ciao

New Year Dawning

Sawadee Khrap

Whether I have a good or bad day is always predicated on my judgements.  I look out and see and judge the day I’m having.  My thoughts determine my day.   My mental images are the projections I proclaim as my reality.   They ARE my thoughts – ‘my spirit’.   And if God is Spirit,  then,  there is only two  ways I can think – with (Spirit) or without (Ego-Edge God Out).  Thinking with Spirit is BEING, without is DREAMING.

So what do I actually see ?    For most of my life I saw only a world of attack, revenge, suffering, sacrifice, with little scatterings of love to keep me interested, but never lasting peace and harmony.  The end of everything is always DEATH.   I only looked to the material world for reference   (Ego – Edging God Out) .  But, since I found sobriety,  I have been developing  a ‘spiritual’ path centered around the words attributed to Jesus in the Bible and other scriptures including  “A Course in Miracles”.  It was through these studies I realized that this world IS JUST  a  “Dream of Specialness or Separation”

SPIRIT-‘ual  , with Spirit – first lets understand what Jesus spoke about?   Here’s some quotes attributed to Him:

In the  Gospel of John verse 18, Jesus says:

“My kingdom is not of this world: if my kingdom were of this world, then would my servants fight, that I should not be delivered to the Jews: but now is my kingdom not from hence.”

and from the Gospel of Thomas:

(#2)  “The one who seeks should not cease seeking until he finds.  And when he finds, he will be dismayed. And when he is dismayed, he will be astonished. And he will be king over the All.”

(#3)  “If those who lead you say to you: ‘Look, the kingdom is in the sky!’ then the birds of the sky will precede you.  If they say to you: ‘It is in the sea,’ then the fishes will precede you. Rather, the kingdom is inside of you and outside of you. When you come to know yourselves, then you will be known, and you will realize that you are the children of the living Father. But if you do not come to know yourselves, then you exist in poverty, and you are poverty.”

(#5)   “Come to know what is in front of you, and that which is hidden from you will become clear to you. For there is nothing hidden that will not become manifest.”

(#57)   “The kingdom of the Father is like a person who had (good) seed. His enemy came by night. He sowed darnel among the good seed.  The person did not allow (the servants) to pull up the darnel.  He said to them: ‘Lest you go to pull up the darnel (and then) pull up the wheat along with it.’ For on the day of the harvest the darnel will be apparent and it will be pulled up (and) burned.”

(#91)   They said to him: “Tell us who you are so that we may believe in you.” He said to them: “You examine the face of sky and earth, but the one who is before you, you have not recognized, and you do not know how to test this opportunity.”

(#113)   His disciples said to him: “The kingdom — on what day will it come?”  “It will not come by watching (and waiting for) it. They will not say: ‘Look, here!’ or ‘Look, there!’ Rather, the kingdom of the Father is spread out upon the earth, and people do not see it.”

And in John’s Gospel  4:19

“The woman saith unto him, Sir, I perceive that thou art a prophet. Our fathers worshipped in this mountain; and ye say, that in Jerusalem is the place where men ought to worship. Jesus saith unto her, Woman, believe me, the hour cometh, when ye shall neither in this mountain, nor yet at Jerusalem, worship the Father.  Ye worship ye know not what: we know what we worship: for salvation is of the Jews. But the hour cometh, and now is, when the true worshippers shall worship the Father in spirit and in truth: for the Father seeketh such to worship him.  God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth.     The woman saith unto him, I know that Messias cometh, which is called Christ: when he is come, he will tell us all things. Jesus saith unto her, I that speak unto thee am he.”

“God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth.”   What does that mean ?   

“Jesus said unto them, If God were your Father, ye would love me: for I proceeded forth and came from God; neither came I of myself, but he sent me.  Why do ye not understand my speech? even because ye cannot hear my word.  Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it. “  (John 8:44 KJV)

I was CREATED in the image and likeness of God – any other image is a lie.

I dream of separation and then project my thoughts and judge them as my world.   It is nothing but a harsh nightmarish  dream !   I dream of specialness called SIN. 

  • A world of death – not LIFE. 
  • A world of time – Not ETRNITY. 
  • A world of attack, fear – Not LOVE. 
  • A world of bodies – Not UNITY, ONENESS
  • A world of lies – Not TRUTH.
  • A world of Ego – Not GOD.

All the words Jesus spoke are starting to make sense – but only if I look at them through the eyes of Christ with FORGIVENESS, INNOCENCE,  and LOVE and not the darkened lens of sin, the lie of the father of the dream.


God Bless   Ciao

Pearl of great price.

Sawadee Khrap

The strong image of the Parable of the Pearl of Great Price was my waking thought.

“Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking beautiful pearls, who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had and bought it.”   (Matthew 13:45-46 New King James Version (NKJV))

And I couldn’t wait to fire up the computer and continue reading my newly fond treasure of literature to study.  Not only do I now have the Ancient Texts, the Bible, and A Course in Miracles (ACIM), I also have accepted Biblically sound courses to offer contrast. 

It is profoundly apparent to me now that Christ is engaging me where I AM in my understanding of God’s Reality.  Taking what I now know and believe,  and introducing me to a more encompassing view of salvation.  I have asked and I am receiving.  I’m  likewise, absolutely sure that I have nothing to preach or teach,  my only function is to ‘Look, Listen, and do not judge’, not tying to change the world but to change my mind about the world , then sharing my experiences, strengths, and hopes of what Christ is doing in my life  with others.  Perhaps you can find your path in their light.   Peace to ALL

God Bless       Ciao.

Yale courses on Christianity

Sawadee Khrap

Ask and you shall find:  I am now exploring the Open Yale University Courses available on YouTube:

  1. 2006, Introduction to Old testament (Hebrew Bible) by Professor Christine Hayes    and 
  2. 2009, Introduction to New Testament” by Professor: Dale B. Martin, Woolsey Professor of Religious Studies. . (Note: This course does not look at the texts as scripture but rather as literature available at that time.)

All sessions are complete with resources, sessions in html, and transcripts in html.  I plan to study the material to better  my understanding of formal accepted theology and Christian practices.  

Quickly perusing the course has already given me a several topics I need to explore:

  • Kaufman’s Metadivine Realm vs. Hebrew God
  • Marcion’s teachings in early Christianity.
  • Melchizedek Genealogy.

For example,   Marcion, in approx.  145 CE :

“ It is ironic that perhaps one of the most influential figures in Church history is also one of the most reviled heretics……… taught that the God of the Old was not the God of the New Testament. The God of the Old Testament was the ‘creating God’, but he was a harsh, cruel, and incompetent . Marcion contrasted this creating God with the God of Jesus, who was nothing less than love and grace.”  (Early Christian Writings,P. Kuby)

In his teachings Marcion rejected entirely the Old Testament,  butchered Paul’s letters, and taught that there was ‘secret knowledge’ taught by Jesus to his disciples and only the church few knew. Heresy indeed.

It is interesting to me that his differences noted between the ‘creating’ God of Geneses 1 and the ‘making’ God of Geneses 2 is not fully considered.   Traditionally “God”  becomes the collective of 1 & 2  but with different names to describe his attributes according to later standardized Jewish doctrine.. I believe Marcion saw a glimpse of the truth but was unable to express it in words or ideas and mistaking  threw out the Old Testament.and other basic doctrine which would be considered heresy.  I will explore this in future posts and submit a model of the “Illusion of realty” which I call the Dream of Specialness or Separation, the basic problem.  I believe this is what’s  fully presented in “A Course in Miracles”.   It does not lessen Jesus’s role or doctrine, and explains many of Jesus’s sayings, teachings and commandments.

Since I began this search for the truth, additional information is coming to light that shows that ancient Chinese characters actually tell the same story as  expressed in the Hebrew Bible using a common oral-based tradition.  Where the Hebrew Bible has Elohim – Yahweh,  Chinese have  Tian – Shang Di  I hoping I can bring this all together.

God Bless    Ciao

Wonderment & Questions

Sawadee Khrap

For years and years I have been looking up and never seeing what was actually there. 11 My vision has been clouded by industrial lighting all around the globe.

This morning my Windows Wallpaper photo above  set me back – I haven’t seen anything like this since I was a kid visiting my grandfather’s farm in rural Nebraska  – lying on my back gazing into the night sky.    That’s over 70 years ago – I HAVE BEEN BLINDED MOST OF MY LIFE by the obscuring light of the ego’s dream  world.   I haven’t  looked at the cosmos or the world with ‘non-judgmental’ clarity and  I’ve almost completely stopped asking  ‘What does this mean?   like  I used to as a child.

Now the section from my last post “The Lifting of the veil”  has even more meaning. Not only looking on each others innocence but the innocence of God’s Creation as a whole.  God’s LOVE  shining through all things.  Truly, even in this dream, there is beauty to behold.

Merry Christmas        God Bless


Does 666 mean anything?

Sawadee Khrap

What does 666 mean to you?   This morning I awoke with this thought on my mind.   666 = the beast in a dream of destruction, The Ego.

So how is 666 presented in the Bible:

“And he causeth all, both small and great, rich and poor, free and bond, to receive a mark in their right hand, or in their foreheads: And that no man might buy or sell, save he that had the mark, or the name of the beast, or the number of his name. Here is wisdom. Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast: for it is the number of a man; and his number is Six hundred threescore and six.”    [Revelation 13:16-18 King James Version (KJV)]         And later in Revelation 12:9     “So the great dragon was cast out, that serpent of old, called the Devil and Satan, who deceives the whole world; he was cast to the earth, and his angels were cast out with him……Now when the thousand years have expired, Satan will be released from his prison and will go out to deceive the nations which are in the four corners of the earth, Gog and Magog, to gather them together to battle, whose number is as the sand of the sea. They went up on the breadth of the earth and surrounded the camp of the saints and the beloved city. And fire came down from God out of heaven and devoured them. The devil, who deceived them, was cast into the lake of fire and brimstone where the beast and the false prophet are. And they will be tormented day and night forever and ever”

WOW!!!    SCARRY.  Then I asked  Google, the library in the cloud, to see what it said:

“The number 6 is significant in the Bible because it is the number of Man, the number of imperfection. It is a human number. It implies man’s existence sans God, sans Christ. … Thus, number 6 in the Bible is related to man and his imperfections or shortcomings.”  and 

“The beast is said to have “a human number” in that the represented governments are of a human origin rather than spirit entities. The number 666 is said to identify “gross shortcoming and failure in the eyes of Jehovah”, in contrast to the number 7, which is seen as symbolizing perfection.”

Man, Man, Man or Ego, Ego,Ego the replacement of the Holy Trinity with the Ego.    WOW!     Ego: Edging God Out.

And yet, my studies remind me :

“The Lifting of the veil
Forget not that you came this far TOGETHER. And it was surely NOT the ego that led you here. No obstacle to peace can BE surmounted through ITS help. IT does not open up its secrets, and
bid you look at them, and go BEYOND them. IT would not have you see its weakness and learn it has NO power to KEEP you from the truth. The Guide Who brought you here REMAINS with you,
and when you raise your eyes, you WILL be ready to look on terror with no fear at all. But first, lift up your eyes and look upon each other in innocence, born of COMPLETE forgiveness of each other’s illusions, and through the eyes of faith, which see them not.”     (ACIM  T 19 L 1.)

MERRY CHRISTMAS – Christ is re-borne (Remembered)  through FORGIVNESS.

God Bless     Ciao

A Meaningful Christmas

Sawadee Khrap

I truly believe that Elohim (God)/Christ is Love, Peace, Truth, Harmony, Eternal Oneness, and the key to Heaven is forgiveness  . As I make these actions paramount in my walk of faith, I read in today’s Lesson 353 (A Course In Miracles). 

My eyes, my tongue, my hands, my feet today Have but one purpose; to be given Christ To use to bless the world with miracles.

Father, I give all that is mine today to Christ, to use in any way that best will serve the purpose that I share with Him. Nothing is mine alone, for He and I have joined in purpose. Thus has learning come almost to its appointed end. A while I work with Him to serve His purpose. Then I lose myself in my Identity, and recognize that Christ is but my Self.”

Christmas is truly coming to me this year, not because of the holiday and gifts, but because of the true recognition of what is meant by the ‘Birth of Christ’.  The “day” is un-important, the concept is not.  The father of all lies of this world can twist the dates but the Holy Spirit can use everything in this world to bring out the truth.   I thank Elohim/God   for such support, otherwise it would have been impossible for me to realize this glaring fact.

The path is follow is so  simple – “give to Caesar what is Caesar’s: give to God what is God’s”      Give ALL  judgments, condemnations, prejudices, and  forgiveness to Elohim/Christ as only He and the Holy Spirit know the way to use them correctly benefitting ALL the Sonship.  Look, Listen and do not judge. All that’s needed will be done for you.  “I need do nothing”

Merry Christmas

God Blesses, I bless, Christ blesses.    Ciao

Who ? is the “Teacher”

Sawadee Khrap

Just talking to a friend, Simon, about “Course information”  and those posting or teaching about it on the web.  One  person, he mentioned, has apparently gotten into  hot water over due to a few suicides  amongst her fans.  Names are not important here, but I would like to use this situation for my own learning.

I pray I have realize that there is only one TEACHER  – the HOLY SPIRIT or CHRIST :

The ONLY thing that I can  post on my blog, is “MY”   experience, strengths and hopes.   Because ONLY THAT is what I truly know, everything else is just hearsay.   This is the greatest lesson that I learned following the AA 12 steps to recovery.   Doing this assures that there can be no discussion, arguments, or advice given but merely sharing of what I found useful.

I am also reminded of Jesus’s words:

But be not ye called Rabbi: for one is your Master, even Christ; and all ye are brethren. And call no man your father upon the earth: for one is your Father, which is in heaven. Neither be ye called masters: for one is your Master, even Christ. But he that is greatest among you shall be your servant. And whosoever shall exalt himself shall be abased; and he that shall humble himself shall be exalted. But woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye shut up the kingdom of heaven against men: for ye neither go in yourselves, neither suffer ye them that are entering to go in.  (Matthew 23:8)

and from the Course:

There IS a rationale for choice. Only ONE teacher KNOWS what your reality is. If learning that is the PURPOSE of the curriculum, you MUST learn it of Him. The ego does NOT KNOW WHAT IT IS TRYING TO TEACH. It is trying to teach you what you are WITHOUT KNOWING IT. The ego is expert ONLY in confusion. It does not understand ANYTHING ELSE. As a teacher, then, it is totally confused and TOTALLY CONFUSING.  Even if you could disregard the Holy Spirit entirely, which is quite impossible, you could learn nothing from the ego, because the ego KNOWS nothing.  (ACIM UrText T8 C. The Rationale for Choice (Notes 762 7:94) .

Many people choose a guru or teacher and follow THEIR advice, or spiritual path, without actually examining and studying the discipline’s  basic teachings.  And if something doesn’t go as expected they then tend to blame it on the guru.  Lord knows, this is what I did for years and years, jumping to judgments and predigests, against other spiritual paths and religions, without fully knowing the truth of any of them.

For myself, I found that I cannot take on the roll of ‘teacher’, before I have FULLY completed the path before me and obtained the oneness with my Master.  Prior to this it’s just my Ego speaking and of no value to me or anyone else.  Now, I believe that I am a “Teacher of God”,  but only to the degree that my actions show.  I am ALWAYS teaching, either from my Ego or from allowing the Holy Spirit to work through me.

I do hope you find some inspiring words, nuggets of inspiration, and possible answers to daily life that suit your needs, BUT, I do not profess to offer advice on how to walk YOUR spiritual path..  Look to the Holy Spirit for that.

Please hold me to this standard.  And PLEASE share your experience, strength and hope on any post if so moved.  Thanks

God Bless        Ciao.

What is JOY

Sawadee Khrap

I saw a great interview on TV about  T.Denny Sanford, billionaire philanthropist. Here’s another one with him on YouTube:


Giving is a joy” is Sanford’s moto and way of life.  He has the means and has already donated over 1.6 billion.  This is a perfect example of giving in the “Spirit”.

Other glaring examples: seeing and sharing a beautiful sunset/ sunrise, a rainbow, an artistic work or painting, a child’s expression of wonderment,  results of living the St Francis prayer, and especially looking into the eyes of a lover.  Joy of the Spirit is BEING.

This IS PEACE, a contentment, love or pure  JOY.  The world vanishes and all that’s there is the beauty I see in front of me, it encompasses me and I become a part.  -“ONE” –   NO JUDGEMENT, or CONDEMNATION, Total acceptance of reality as it is.  The magnitude mentioned in the Course passage in my past post.

I can feel this joy expanding as I write this post – the union of us all, the idea that we all share the divine function and the inherence that is ours.

Contrast this JOY with the joy, as sought in the world of bodies, where  getting, having, controlling, using something are but fleeting instant gratifications, needed to be done over and over again because it will never be as great as it was the first time.   An addiction that can never be satisficed.  As Buddhism puts it “suffering” in its basic form.

God Bless   Ciao.


Sawadee Khrap

First thing I thought of while writing this post is Jesus words:

   “If you bring it into being within you, (then) that which you have will save you.  If you do not have it within you, (then) that which you do not have within you [will] kill you.”  (Gospel of Thomas #70)

And I randomly open my ACIM book to this:

“There is no doubt about what your function IS, for the Holy Spirit KNOWS what it is. There is no doubt about its magnitude, for it reaches you through Him, FROM Magnitude. You do not have to strive for it, because you HAVE it. All your striving must be directed AGAINST LITTLENESS, for it DOES require vigilance to protect your magnitude in this world. To hold your magnitude in perfect awareness, in a world of littleness, is a task the little cannot undertake. Yet it is asked of you, in tribute to your magnitude, and NOT your littleness. Nor is it asked of you alone. The power of God will support every effort you make on behalf of the magnitude of His dear Son. Search for the little, and you DENY yourself His power. God is not willing that His Son be content with less than everything. For He is not content without His Son, and His Son cannot be content with less than His Father has given him. We asked you once before, “Would you be hostage to the ego or host to God?” Let this question be asked you by the Holy Spirit in you, EVERY time you make a decision. For every decision you make DOES answer this, and invites sorrow or joy, accordingly”  (ACIM text 15:4)

By making every decision throughout the day in concert with the Holy Spirit IS my function. Seeing “Christ” everywhere is my JOY.  How much JOY I see today is entirely up to me.  Look for littleness(condemnation and/or judgements)  and see sorrow :: Christ –joy.

Easily said, realizing I had built my life on judgements – now I need develop a new way of seeing – joyful experiences will tell me when it’s working. Can I make them all day?

God Bless    Ciao


Following Jesus

Sawadee Khrap

One thing is becoming very clear – Following Jesus is relying on a personal relationship with “Christ” – this to me means that my dependence on Christ is direct and not through any 3rd party, church or anyone else telling me that they know the way or this is what He said and meant.

If I truly believe that Jesus is my guide and is always there to help me, then anything I examine and honestly meditate on,  asking for guidance – that truth will be reveled to me.

One criteria that must be  apparent with any insights, guidance, or revelations is that – “True is always True”.   if it is false, at ANY time, it is False all the time.    Therefore if there is ANY exception, in the past, present, or future, then it’s FALSE.  If it needs ANY defense, it’s FALSE.   Jesus WAS the TRUTH and the LIGHT and spoke only the TRUTH.

More and more ancient scrolls, books, scriptures, papers and myths are coming to light.  In my earlier spiritual walk I depended on others to tell me the way, NOW I have but ONE GUIDE “Christ”.   I am amazed about how clear the answers come,  not in my time, but they do come if I but leave myself open to receiving them.

Nice meditative walk this morning – lots of questions – no answers yet, perhaps tonight or tomorrow.  But I am confident that they will come – loud and clear.

With all LOVE,       Ciao.

The Good News spreads

Sawadee Khrap

First was the finding of the Genesis story in China’s letters – now other books and scrolls  existence in Africa.


Of interest to me is “The Ethiopian Orthodox Täwahïdo Church broke away from other denominations of Christianity when it rejected the Council of Chalcedon in 451 A.D. Its different doctrinal history means that it has preserved a number of important ancient religious texts that otherwise would be completely lost. Unlike the King James Bible, which contains 66 books, the Ethiopic Bible (which is written in Ge’ez) contains 84 books.”.   Exploring these additional books should be very rewarding.  

Thanks Ed for the heads-up.