And here’s my favorite

Sawadee Khrap

Three blondes were all applying for the last available position on the Texas Highway Patrol.

The detective conducting the interview looked at the three of them and said, "So y’all want to be cops, huh?"   The blondes all nodded.   The detective got up, opened a file drawer, and pulled out a folder.   Sitting back down, he opened it, pulled out a picture, and said,  "To be a detective, you have to be able to detect.  You must be able to notice things such as distinguishing features and oddities like scars and so forth." 

So saying, he stuck the photo in the face of the first blonde and withdrew it after about two seconds.  "Now,"  he said,   "did you notice any distinguishing features about this man?" The blonde immediately said, "Yes, I did. He has only one eye!"  The detective shook his head and said, "Of course he has only one eye in this picture!  It’s a profile of his face!   You’re dismissed!"

The detective then turned to the second blonde, stuck the photo in her face for two seconds, pulled it back, and said, "What about you? Notice anything unusual or Outstanding about this man?"  "Yes! He only has one ear!"  The detective put his head in his hands and exclaimed,  "Didn’t you hear what I just told the other lady?  This is a profile of the man’s face! Of course you can only see one ear!    You’re excused too!"

The detective turned his attention to the third and last blonde and said,  "This is probably a waste of time, but…."   He flashed the photo in her face for a couple of seconds and withdrew it, saying,  "All right, did you notice anything distinguishing or Unusual about this man?"  The blonde said,  "I sure did. This man wears contact lenses.

"The detective frowned, took another look at the picture, and began looking at some of the papers in the folder.  He looked up at the blonde with a puzzled expression and said, "You’re absolutely right!   His bio says he wears contacts!  How in the world could you tell that by looking at his picture?"  The blonde rolled her eyes and said,

"Well,  Hellooooooooooooo! With only  One eye and one ear, he certainly can’t wear glasses."

Ciao

And one for us old folks

Sawadee Khrap

It’s Hell to be Old
OLD people have problems that you haven’t even considered yet.

An 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, ‘Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.’

The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor’s office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.

The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, ‘Well, doc, it’s like this — first I tried with my right hand, but nothing.  Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.  ‘Then I asked my wife for help.  She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing.  She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing.  ‘We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezin’ it between her knees, but still nothing’

The doctor was shocked! ‘You asked your neighbor?’  
The old man replied, ‘Yep, none of us could get the jar open.’

Thanks Paul – be sure and sign up for the Funnies delivered to your door    “subscribe” as the subject     fasgroup1@hotmail.com

Ciao

A little humor from paul’s Sunday funnies

Sawadee Khrap

This Southern boy is walking along a beach when he comes across a lamp partially buried in the sand. he picks up the lamp and gives it a rub.

Two blonde genies appear, and they tell him he has been granted three wishes. the guy makes his three wishes and the blonde genies disappear.  the next thing the guy knows, he’s in a bedroom, in a golf-course mansion , surrounded by 50 beautiful women.

After he makes love to all of them, he begins to explore this fabulous house.  suddenly he feels something soft under his feet, he looks down and the floor is covered in $100 bills.  then, there’s a knock at the door.
 
He answers it and standing there are two persons dressed in Ku Klux Klan outfits. they drag him outside to the nearest tree, throw a rope over a limb and hang him by the neck until he’s dead.
 
As the klansmen are walking away, they remove their hoods. it’s the two blonde genies. one blonde genie says to the other one, ‘I can understand the first wish having all these beautiful women in a big mansion to make love to. I can also understand him wanting to be a millionaire.  but why he wanted to be hung like a black guy is beyond me.’

Ciao

Runners

Sawadee Khrap

A little different version – painting and photograph combined.

1500m Final Finish -Edit-2

I think I needed to adjust the background photo to be just a little smaller to add to the perspective and then increase the shadow cast by the painting, still looks floating. – Any suggestions.   This is my first attempt at this kind of illusion and as you can see I have a lot to learn. But at least the main idea shows through.   Thanks Pat for a great image to play with.

Ciao

Paintings

Sawadee Khrap

Pat from Ireland sent me a couple of his images for me to try CS6 painting effects on.  Here are the originals:1500m Final Finish_

Colin Costello_

and here are the paintings from them.  I tried to show action and emotion and to emphasize the main subjects.  I tried several effects from the new “Oil Painting” to sketching layers and  the new mixing brushes.  Comments appreciated:

1500m Final Finish -Edit-Edit

Colin Costello -paint

What do you think – I am getting better  Pat is going to try and have them printed in a local Running Magazine – and send me a copy, that would be nice.  I’ll tell ya, Photography and Photoshop make a great hobby and one that I can bring to any event and have fun.

Ciao

New adams Apple – Chiang Mai web-site

Sawadee Khrap

Be sure and check out the New Adams Apple Club  Chiang Mai website.

AdamsApple

Wow  Really Nice.    But better yet make sure you get to a show and see the great lineup of BOYS and GIRLS there – Now that I live in Pattaya, I miss being able to stop in and watch a show and check with the boys – great talent there – but I am planning on a visit later in the year.  C U then Todd.

And I also want to mention Bon Tong ProductionsBontong – great web design for Adam’s – Love it  Peter   —- Chiang Mai needed a good web design Production house and it appears you have supplied it –

Of course you don’t have to be in Chiang Mai to benefit from their services – anywhere in the world  – if you need a great web page created – I suggest you check with them.

Ciao

Rimpa Lapin Scenic Bar & Restaurant

Sawadee Khrap

RimpaLapin20120712_181518

Just got back from a great dinner and night out with a friend.  What a excellent place to go – try Rimpa-Lapin  on the way to Sattahip. Great food, wonderful view (I will go back and get some better shots – it was raining and I only had my phone camera).  Dinner for 2, drinks for about 600 Baht.

20120712_182719-Edit

This is the start of the sunset but then the rains came and blocked it completely – but still beautiful (camera phone panorama) and quite a view.  Thanks Aum.

Ciao

Peky’s Birthday Party

Sawadee Khrap

I really have to apologize – these are terrible photos – tried to get some night shots with my phone camera – took a few and then gave up   BUT it was a great evening – excellent food, great singers and a wonderful cabaret show at the finish.  All free, of course except for the drinks.  Peky’s Birthday at the “?” Question Mark bar in Jontiem.

20120710_21172720120710_203118

Alex was there with his b/f and Ted up top his usual tricks in his Irish hair and hat wig –  that’s Degs next to him.

20120710_20340920120710_203055

and Ton – a cute waiter at the bar.   We are going to do a photo shot later and should have some good images of him later.

20120710_203421

 

This coming Friday there is supposed to be a “PINK” party at Jontiem Complex and I promise to take the big camera and get some shots of the evening.

Thing are really slow here now during the rainy season and many such venues are planned to get the available customers.

I have to make sure to get some shots of the boys at each bar to give you a peek at the bevy of beautiful boys here in Pattaya, especially the  Jontiem Beach area.

Ciao

Aod stopped by

Sawadee Khrap

Aod stopped by yesterday and we had a little Photoshop fun.     Got some new photos and showed him the emails that you guys sent in US-Apt-Aod-1

about his  previous images  – he really liked them and says he looks forward to meeting you when you visit Pattaya next time and will send you a email back.  Be sure and look for him on Jontiem Beach.

_MG_3355-Edit

Ciao

Not a chortle or a guffaw–but truth

Sawadee Khrap

Here is another tidbit from Paul’s Sunday email.  Something we should all remember – you can even see this attitude on the beach – the longer the boys are here the lazier they become.

An economics professor at Texas Tech said he had never failed many students at one time except on the occasion when he failed an entire class. That class had insisted that socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer.

The professor then said ok, we will have an experiment in this class on socialism. All grades would be averaged and everyone would receive the same grade so no one would fail and no one would be outstanding.  After the first test the grades were averaged and everyone got a B. The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy. But, as the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too; so they studied little. The second test average was a D!  No one was happy. When the 3rd test rolled around the average was an F.

The scores never increased as bickering, blame, and name calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one would study for the benefit of anyone else.  All failed, to their great surprise. The professor then told them that socialism would also ultimately fail because when the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great; but when all the reward is taken away, no one will work to succeed.

Nothing could be any simpler than that….

Of course there is also a lack of possibilities for growth here to add to the problem – good jobs are scarce and wages are low, easier just to find a willing farang  -  but still when you receive something free it has little or no value -  iPhones, gold necklaces, computer, dinners – and so on. – nothing saved, spend today – just the same tomorrow or maybe dead , who know – just enjoy now.  Not an attitude to build a future.

Ciao

Sign up for Sunday’s Funnies

Sawadee Khrap

This one is sick but made me laugh – But sign up for Paul’s Sunday Funnies – email fasgroup1@hotmail.com  with Subscribe as subject.  He has a lot of good humor each week – check it out

 

A VERY ugly man walks into the bar with a big grin on his face, and orders a draft beer.
 
‘What are you so happy about?’, asks the Bartender.
 
‘Well, I’ll tell you,’ replies the ugly man.  ‘As you know, I live by the railroad tracks.  Well, on my way home from the bar last night, I noticed a young woman tied to the tracks, just like in the films.  I, of course, went and cut her free and took her back to my place.
Anyway, to make a long story short, I scored big time! We made love all night, all over the house.  We did everything! Me on top, sometimes her on top, every position imaginable!’
‘Fantastic, you lucky bastard!’, exclaimed the Bartender.  Was she pretty?’ 
‘Dunno…Never found the head!’

 

Handle every stressful situation like a dog.
Piss on it and walk away

Ciao